This blog edition finds us basking in the recent glory of the Oscars, where the great and the good were celebrated on Hollywood’s most glitzy night of the year.
Yes, it was sycophantic, the joke hitting ratio was patchy (as were the state of some of the outfits), and it was more than three hours long and started at 11pm (and I had to look mildly presentable for the school run the next morning). But despite all this, AND Jonathan Ross, it was free to view on ITV, and if you don’t support these things, then they get taken away from you. I did it for us, guys… I did it all for us…(applause and standing ovation follows…)
One Battle After Another (2025) and Sinners (2025, pictured below), were big winners on the night, with reported budgets of between $130 – $175 million and $90 – $100 million respectively. James Cameron’s Avatar: Fire and Ash (2025), which took Best Visual Effects, was made for at least $350 million, and the film’s marketing costs made the actual total reach millions more.
Beavering Away on a Micro-budget
So, where does that leave those aspiring independent film makers who have not secured a lucrative studio deal, or managed to source the financing for their epic passion project?
If the credit card limits have long been exceeded, and you actually like having a place to live, a number of cost cutting methods can be explored to produce your masterpiece. Ideas may include: sourcing locations for no charge, using free downloadable software, calling in favours, shooting at weekends, paying your extras with sandwiches and asking the crew to double up on production duties and as cast members. Any film student who ever made their communal kitchen double for a post-apocalyptic nuclear bunker (even with a cleaning rota) will tell you that it all helps to reduce the overall price of your labour of love.
Notable low-budget titles, which went on to be very successful, include Clerks (1994) – $27,500; El Mariachi (1992) – $7,000; The Blair Witch Project (1999) – $60,000; Paranormal Activity (2007) – $15,000, and Terrifier (2016, pictured below) – $35,000. (Figures are historic, have not been adjusted with inflation or account for all post- production and marketing costs – I sound like a lawyer…)
Director Sean Baker made his ‘Queer Christmas classic’ Tangerine (2015), by using three iPhone 5s, film equipment from a Kickstarter site and editing the project himself. The total budget was $100,000 and it became a Sundance Festival favourite. Baker’s Anora (2024) won Best Picture at last year’s Oscars, and having cost $6 million, it required far fewer guerrilla-tactics to finance it.
Hundreds of B-Movies
Budding filmmakers often choose a horror movie for their first feature. The genre relies on dark sets and confined locations, the suggestion of fear over grotesquely showing it, sound instead of visual effects and chilling shocks as a substitute for big stars (who probably would get dismembered early on in the narrative anyway). Both Halloween (1978) and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974, pictured below) (I’ve still never seen it, and it’s going to stay that way), began life as small, murky, independent pictures, before growing into the gigantic cult franchises revered by Horror-fans and film aficionados across the globe.
According to the internet, the lowest budget feature film of recent times was Colin (2008). Marc Price wrote and directed the British zombie movie, which was made for £45, using a ten-year-old video camera and edited using Adobe software on a PC. Colin was shown at various international festivals and received a theatrical release in the UK. It can be bought on Amazon for £3.99. The film’s entire budget would buy 11 copies of the DVD, or one small coffee and half a croissant from Gails. You decide.
Super Furry Animals
All this preamble has laid ground to introduce the next film in the CFS season, being screened on Wednesday 1st April. Hundreds of Beavers (2022, pictured below) is a knock-about, surreal, black and white homage to slapstick comedy, seemingly filmed for about 25p ($150,000). Directed by Mike Cheslik, Hundreds of Beavers tells the story of hapless apple jack farmer, Jean Kayak (Ryland Tews), and his battle against the local wildlife of rural Wisconsin. After beavers set fire to his orchard, and he falls in love with the daughter of the local merchant, Kayak finds himself on a mission to accrue hundreds of beaver pelts to seek revenge on the furry critters, and to win the hand of the woman of his dreams.
If the animated sequences from Monty Python and the cast of the late 60s Banana Splits children’s show (I’ve almost lost you, please stay with me) merged, it would look a lot like this.
No animals, or wildlife documentary makers, were harmed during the making of this film, with a reported $10,000 of the total budget being spent on plush, animal mascot outfits.
It might take our discerning audience about ten minutes to get into the rhythm of the comedy, but once the film hits its stride, Hundreds of Beavers is an hour and forty minutes of silly, innovative fun. There’s enough bad news in the world at the moment, so give yourselves the night off and enjoy this – you probably won’t see anything else like it on the big screen this year, unless you go to a silent movie festival. (But if you don’t like it, please don’t pelt the CFS committee with abuse…)
Gnaw-ty or G-nice?
If Hundreds of Beavers has got you in the mood to watch more films featuring the furry friends…
The Beaver (2010)
He’s an outspoken ambassador for the Trump administration, with a history of questionable life choices and problematic world views.
She is the original ’80s LGBTQ+ Hollywood poster child who helped pave the way for equality in the film industry.
They’re the original old couple!
Oscar winners (and real life actual pals) Mel Gibson and Jodie Foster reunite in a comedy drama (that Foster directed) about a depressed father who finds a way back to connection with his family, by making wry and cynical observations about life through the mouth of a furry puppet, before realising that the only strings that he ever really needs to pull are in his heart (bleugh…). If anyone wants to see a condensed version of an Antipodean male with an obnoxious sock puppet on his fist, watch the Unicorse or Bob Bilby episodes of Bluey on iPlayer. Sorry Jodie, but the Heelers win this one.
Hoppers (2026)
Disney Pixar bounces back into the charts this Easter, with the child-friendly version of Avatar (2009). A team of scientists find a way to ‘hop’ human consciousness into the body of robotic animals, thus being able to communicate with the local wildlife, including beavers, in an attempt to save their local glade from the threat of urban development. It might be a stretch for some adults to see more talking animals on screen, but as the main protagonist is named Mabel, and she shares her name with the youngest member of my household, we will be watching this over the holidays, and I’ll let you know the verdict.
Zombeavers (2014)
A group of teenagers go for a fun camping weekend at an eerie lake, populated by a huge colony of blood thirsty beavers. What could possibly go wrong? You liked Jaws (1975)? You liked Anaconda (2025)? You liked Sharknado (2013)? Well, get yourself over to the zoo and hope for a disaster, it’ll be better than watching this pile of sticks.
DAM! The Story of Kit the Beaver (2017)
The Toronto Symphony Orchestra produces a lively score for this animated short, to introduce the younger generation to the joys of classical music. Think A Young Person’s Guide to the Orchestra (1945) or Peter and the Wolf, for a modern audience. (I say modern. 2017 was nine years ago…yes…it was…) Anyway, you can find it on Youtube and it’s quite sweet and delightful.
(There are other titles, of course, but I am wary of being swamped by the niche algorithm…)
Critter-cal Mass
I hope to see you at the screening on Wednesday, and that you enjoy what promises to be the most quirky and surreal title in this season’s lineup. There’s no discount for coming dressed in an animal onesie, but it might get you an audition for this year’s Elgiva panto.
Perhaps this film might encourage our audience to further appreciate wildlife, especially that found in the British Isles. Beavers are currently being reintroduced to our shores in a project by the Wildlife Trusts, so keep an eye out for them during your next staycation. And, if some angry MP comes knocking on your door, stirred up with vitriol about how it’s outrageous that our furry friends are replacing historic figures on the back of our good nation’s bank notes, feel free to answer with gay abandon ‘Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a dam’.
Be good to each other and see you at the movies.
Sarah
Information about the Chiltern Film Society can be found HERE
